“Why don’t you start the shower. I know it’s early, but we could both use a good wash after last night. I’ll be right in.”“Okay mum,” I said. Once in the bathroom, I started the shower. I grabbed an extra towel and went to bring it down the hall to my mother. As I approached her door, I could see her through the dusky darkness, laying down like she was with her hand between her legs. She was writhing back and forth, slowly and softly moaning. I didn’t interrupt, but stood there and watched her. She was using one hand to massage her breasts and the other was between her legs. It made me think of the movies I had seen before and I felt myself getting excited. She turned her head and looked at me and seen me watching her, but it didn’t seem to matter because she just continued what she was doing. I approached her and laid the towel on the bed next to her and told her I had brought it for her, but still she continued what she was doing. “Thanks darling. I will be right there.”I took that. . "So, if I told you I was thinking about, I don't know, going all the way with a guy..." she said before I cut her off. "Absolutely not," I said. It's bad enough that I just had a small moment of admiration of my own daughter's naked body. I really did not want to talk with her about losing her virginity. "Daddy," she continued, "you didn't let me finish." Maybe it was my fault. Maybe my moment of weakness the night before was the symptom of a bigger problem. Maybe I was beginning to fail as a role model. That thought terrified me. "Look, what you saw last night was a mistake," I said. "I've tried to raise you with good morals and be a good role model for you." "You are a good role model, Daddy," she said. "You took me in when I was eight. You raised me. And you raised me with good values. But I'm almost 18 and I'm going to be a grown woman." "But you'll always be my little girl," I said. That night, I lay in bed with terrible thoughts. I imagined my own daughter making a sexual move.
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